Tangent 21 - Death

Posted by
Maffrew

Posted on
10:56
Feb 11 2003

Death

My question is this...

Death - What's the big deal?

At 7am this morning, I was woken up by my mobile phone. It was my Mum, ringing to tell me that my Grandad died early this morning. Was I upset by this? No, I wasn't. To be honest, I am kind of glad he is dead. He was a heavy smoker and had angina for years, we've also known that he had a brain tumour for several years and he got a bit of senile dementia, so most of the time he had trouble remembering who most people were. Even so, people at breakfast this morning expected me to be upset. I am not.

It could (and probably will) be attributed to the fact that he is old. Most people hate death, but they don't mind it as much if it's someone old, who has been in alot of pain for many years. Death is a release for them.

But not too many months ago my Cousin and her friend died in a car accident. She was driving along and swerved to miss an animal in the road. The car ploughed into a tree, my Cousin and her friend died on impact and two friends in the back were badly injured. She was 17 and had passed her driving liscence for 2 weeks. I was not upset then either. People found this strange.

No-one was nasty about it or anything, but people didn't seem to understand how I could be so unphased by what most would call a tragic accident. Well, I don't understand why they are upset by it.

People live. People die. Life can be and is for the most-part very complicated, but when you take it down to the basics, we are born, we live, we reproduce for the survival of the species and we die. That is the life of the human animal. To me, it seems very simple. Death has this huge stigma attatched to it though. People fear it, they cower from it. Some rush to it as a release.

I can honestly, with my hand on my heart say i do not fear death. I fear pain, I fear harm to my being. But i do not fear death. To me, death means non-existence. My body stops living and thus I am no more. I find nothing to fear in that.

I become puzzled by people who have no connection to a person getting upset about the death of someone they have no connection to. This is most evident with celebrities. On this site even today, there is a post about a celebrity death, and people mourn it. Why? People die all the time, it is the natural progression of life, if you will.

So, my second question is... am i Enlightened, or emotionally stunted?

26 Replies and 3150 Views in Total. [ 1 2 ]

Samphirette To you I guess I'm just a clown who picks you up each time you're down

by Maffrew
I can honestly, with my hand on my heart say i do not fear death. I fear pain, I fear harm to my being. But i do not fear death. To me, death means non-existence. My body stops living and thus I am no more. I find nothing to fear in that.

by MonSTeR
But to not fear your own death?!?!? I'd attribute that to inexperience.

I don't fear my own death. Maff has summed a few things up nicely though - I fear pain. I see movies and think well I wouldn't want to be stabbed violently to death, or be sliced in two by a train. That's a fear of pain not a fear of non existence.

I think Star Trek also summed this up when Data was talking to Tasha Yar's sister (an episode that I saw recently) when he was explaining how he sees many crew members die, but it was his sense of familiarity with Tasha that caused him to miss her. I believe death of family members does depend hugely on your emotional ties or dependence on them. Yes if your partner died you would miss them, but it would be because your day to day familarity had been lost. You'd wake up in the morning and have to rebuild and reconstruct your life.

Posted: 01:16 Feb 12 2003

Sange It's only kinky the first time!!! after that it's just the Norm ;o)

Death effects us all in different ways as many people have said , we grieve for the loss of someone but depending on whom that someone is depends why we grieve feel pain and loss. On the most part we grieve for ourselves not for the person that died, we feel loss we are upset because we will never see this person again, that we can't talk to them anymore we can't hug them ( in all honesty it is about us not the person whom dies )And I tend to believe thats why we grieve for a close person to us that dies.

However I have felt myself grieve, get upset for people I don't know not famous people but for innocent lives of children that I didn't know or would have ever known but have been brutally taken away from the world by violent means, in this case I feel I am grieving for the person, what they must have gone through thier suffering not for myself.

Posted: 11:13 Feb 12 2003

Alan Got a message from the Great Lakes Avengers, They offered me a membership but didn't accept... they're a walking disaster... Just don't make sense at all... the worst heroes of all time, To call thems

I've found that through experience of death of family/friends (of which, unfortunately, I have quite a bit) that the death itself doesn't upset me, but it's either the notion that I won't see them again (which was especially true when someone I consider to be my best mate at the time died some years ago in pretty nasty circumstances

) or that other people are upset by a friend/family member's death, and that in turn (ie: people being upset) upsets me ('cos the whole atmosphere, especially at funerals is pretty depressing) but I'm used to (the concept of) death itself to an extent where it doesn't scare or upset me like it used to.

by Pegasus
I don't fear my own death. Maff has summed a few things up nicely though - I fear pain. I see movies and think well I wouldn't want to be stabbed violently to death, or be sliced in two by a train. That's a fear of pain not a fear of non existence.

Pain, however, (the more the, um, "better" for want of a better word) scares the bejesus out of me. (People who know me know I flinch really easily) This is one of the reasons as to why I'm such a wuss when it comes to fights and stuff.

(Edited by Alan 12/02/2003 12:59)

Posted: 12:59 Feb 12 2003

bipolar "Aurgh! Arugh jeeez!! NO! NO NINA! BAD NINA!"

by Alan
(People who know me know I flinch really easily) This is one of the reasons as to why I'm such a wuss when it comes to fights and stuff.

(Edited by Alan 12/02/2003 12:59)

this is like me too i can't even watch tom and jerry cartoons without flinching as instead of always finding it funny the immediate sedcond thought is "ow that would hurt" when i watched braveheart i wasnt crying at the end coz it was so sad but at the thought of how painful it would've been to be conscious and being gutted. same was with dog soliders.

Posted: 14:26 Feb 12 2003

Miss Edith People don't fall in love with what's right in front of them. People want the dream -- what they can't have. The more unattainable, the more attractive. --Xander

by Desire

but to have the person you love more than anything in the world be killed with no warning, no time to say you love them, leaves you with nothing but pain, guilt and despair. It certainly isn't (for me) an affirmation of life. It is the single most horrific experience of my life and I would rather die myself than have to endure that again.

I feel EXACTLY the same, I'm just not good at putting it into words. So I second that!

Posted: 18:45 Feb 12 2003

Samphirette To you I guess I'm just a clown who picks you up each time you're down

by EvilWillow
(quotes)this is like me too i can't even watch tom and jerry cartoons without flinching as instead of always finding it funny the immediate sedcond thought is "ow that would hurt"

I'm still surprised watching those now that kids aren't more violent towards cats etc because of Tom & Jerry cartoons !

when i watched braveheart ..... the thought of how painful it would've been to be conscious and being gutted.

Oh hell yeah the thought of that freaked me out too. Blood and guts on films isn't my idea of fun even if I am intrigued from the corner of a cushion

Posted: 22:27 Feb 12 2003

Acker No power in the 'verse can stop me.

Did you see your Grandad and cousin very often? Don't you miss them?
I don't know either of those people, but I still find it quite sad that they have died, especially your cousin who was only 17. Maybe death isn't such a bad thing, but you always have to think about the people left behind.
Don't you feel bad for your Mum, who has lost her Dad, or your Auntie and Uncle, who have lost their child?

Posted: 15:36 Feb 15 2003

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