i dunno what to suggest except and bare with me coz this is a tad off-topic... stop calling us women/girls/the female of the species "BIRDS"!
I counted 6 "birds" in that one paragraph alone.



(Edited by EvilWillow 02/04/2003 23:16)

I dunno, but I'm just confused

Ditch women altogether and become an ornothologist?

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by EvilWillow
stop calling us women/girls/the female of the species "BIRDS"!

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Personally, I've always liked a certain eight-year old's interpretation of Spike's favourite phrase for women...

As for the matter at hand, whatever anyone says I suspect the outcome will be the same, you'll let them both pass you by as you continue to obsess on the unobtainable, Spike.

What you should do, is take control and stop pussyfooting about. Do you really like both? Is there any real chance of repairing things with the one you prefer? If you can repair things then stop talking about it and do it. Even if you fail it's better to have tried than to always wonder. If you can't repair things, or have failed in trying, and you really do like the other girl, then go on the date. It's that simple. All you have to do is be honest. To yourself, as much as anyone else. And take responsibility for your actions and get stuck in there instead of prevaricating all the time. Which is what you will actually do.

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by Jayjay
(quotes)
prevaricating

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Pre-what??

Yeah I have to admit, I always go for the unobtainable, but thats cuz I know I can't have it so i want it more if you nkow what I mean. I think i'll make somethnig for the 'Woman' who I do really really like, and send her it.

So you are trying to play things *too* safe by going for ladies that you don't think will say yes?

That sounds like a big confidence problem Spike Don't rule yourself out before asking them. How do you know they'll say no? What have you got to lose?

I think JJ's right - you have to stop "pussyfooting around"

JJ dont get me wrong being called bird usually doesnt bother me in the slightest but when it becomes SO repetitive in one message (or any word, well other then the normal and's or's the's if's etc - thought i'd add that before anyone tried being funny ) it makes my brain twinge.

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by Pegasus
So you are trying to play things *too* safe by going for ladies that you don't think will say yes?

That sounds like a big confidence problem Spike Don't rule yourself out before asking them. How do you know they'll say no? What have you got to lose?

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Thats what I do and you dont want to be like that, tis very bad Just go for the one you like, if you're just going out with the other one because shes more obtainable then think about how that would make her feel if she found out. Just do what YOU want to do but make sure noone else gets hurt while you're doing it!

P.s are you sure you dont just really really like the first girl because she really really liked you and then she stopped and you missed the attention? (not being nasty its just that that sometimes happens)

Evil Willow, fret not. Spike has that affect with his affectations (see what I'm doing there ) on a lot of people. I've just been desensitized to it. Plus it's Spike and being annoyed by Spike is like being annoyed by a particularly cute puppy. Just can't be done.

And chasing the unobtainable is something we all do from time to time. I know I have. When everything is out of reach then you can comfort yourself for not really trying. It's safe. But in the end it's lonely and depressing. It's always better to be rejected and move on then to be always stood on the sidelines dreaming. Romance is not a spectator sport.

And making a gift for your preferred paramour is all well and good, but it is hardly taking the bull by the horns. Do it, by all means. But then put your cards on the table and tell her how you feel. Life is not a rehearsal. We are here only once (sorry Buddhists!) and we get only one bite of the apple. So bite hard rather than stare longingly.

Ok, after a long thought, I dunno what to do still. I think I should admit though that i'm not interested in this girl I wanna take out, i'm just taking whtevrer comes along, I mean shes gorgeous and nice, but I just don't think shes me. I have to catch a train at about 5.30 if i do take her out, and I don't realkly wanna turn her down, but I don't really wanna take her out either I think I only wanted to take her out in the hope of getting something off her, but thats totally wrong and I can't lead her on if I don't like her that much and she likes me. So should I take her out or not?

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by SPIKE
I only wanted to take her out in the hope of getting something off her, but thats totally wrong and I can't lead her on if I don't like her that much and she likes me. So should I take her out or not?

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Well, you've just answered your own question, haven't you?

Spike think of this, you are lucky if you know it is a date. The amount of times I have been out with a friend who thought she was on a date with me is pretty silly, especially considering had I had been hit on directly I would have gone out with her more than just as a friend.

Happens the other way round as well wanting to go on a date with a friend.

Normally only find out the situation a few years later. One was real silly as I did get directly hit on (sharing a room at a convention as friends) but I upset her by pushing her away as I thought she was drunk on top of medicine. ember converstaion on animal rights as she was an active campaigner (direct action) and I was not.

Only realised a few years later when run into her again that I had rejected her (I thought I was doing the proper thing) by which time she had a child and a long term boyfriend, though was still way to young to be in that situation), and I still had feelings for her.

Should really have got married when I had the chance, but was 23/24 and was having problems getting over an ex from 4 years earlier, as not doing it was a part of the reason for breaking up with the person I nearly married. Not been in steady relationship where I knew where I was since.

Babbling and probably as nearly as hard to undertand in terms of language use and context as Spike.

(Edited by Gopher 05/04/2003 15:11)

Ok I ahve cancelled however I do feel a bit bad now
I shall set my mind on Nikki cuz she is much more my type

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by SPIKE
I shall set my mind on Nikki cuz she is much more my type

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Babe, I thought your type was female with a heartbeat

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by Teresa
(quotes)

Babe, I thought your type was female with a heartbeat

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i am very picky however you would come top of my list

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by SPIKE
(quotes) i am very picky however you would come top of my list

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Lucky Teresa

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by Gopher
Spike think of this, you are lucky if you know it is a date. The amount of times I have been out with a friend who thought she was on a date with me is pretty silly, especially considering had I had been hit on directly I would have gone out with her more than just as a friend.

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Gopher matey, you do seem to be unlucky in love.

Big hugs to you, and here's hoping you find the girl of your dreams.

Someday she'll come out of the blue...